Wreta Gestgifveri, Jönåker, Södermanland, Sweden *** (CLOSED)

Q: What is it? A: A weekend getaway for couples, conveniently located a mere 1.5-hour-drive from Stockholm. Not overly exciting, not overly exclusive but pretty OK as a… well, weekend getaway.

* * * WRETA GESTGIFVERI IS CURRENTLY CLOSED * * *

Looks pretty much like any other house in well-off suburbia.

Where did the old building go? Apart from the fact that they’ve used wood, trying to mimic the Swedish mansion style, there’s not much left of the traditional gestgifveri-look on the outside.

At least 1.5 kg of afternoon tea-stuff. Tea not pictured.

The stuff that comes with your tea. These are sandwiches and little bites and… stuff. Delicious stuff. Approximate weight: 1.5 kg, (plate not included).

It looks like an ordinary room but here, afternoon tea takes place.

This is the first room you encounter at Wreta Gestgifveri. It has the looks of an old mansion-house. This is the epicenter. Ground zero. This is where they serve afternoon tea.

Looks nice. The food was less impressive.

The crime scene. Here’s where a loud-mouthed, semi-fat gentleman in a sweaty shirt ruined a nice birthday dinner. Why the staff didn’t throw him out, I cannot tell.

A record-breaking afternoon tea…
In the US there is a guy named Eric Booker, who is known as Badlands. He is probably one of the fastest eaters in the world. Mr Badlands once ate 49 glazed donuts in less than eight minutes – that’s one donut every 10 seconds.
When I’m sitting in a Gustavian couch in an old guesthouse 136 km south of Stockholm and the afternoon tea buffet is served, I come to think about Badlands. Look once more at the picture above. The plate is weighing in at least 1.5 kg. The chocolate cake will easily feed a family of five. Here it is in company with other goodies that should be consumed prior to the cake.

Expect no wilderness.
Wreta Gestgifveri is oddly squeezed in between the old and the new highway (E4) just outside the town of Jönåker. While staying at Wreta, traffic is not really an annoying thing, but don’t expect that there are vast areas of forests to stroll in. You go to Wreta in order to relax and to feel like a, yes… a guest in a guesthouse from the 18th century.

The nightlife is spelled sauna and hot tub.
The snow is falling outside, but this is probably as far away from after-ski you will ever get.
The only element disturbing an otherwise peaceful dinner is a loud man – apparently he’s somehow connected to the company that runs the place. The loud man is running around, publicly declaring that he wants a special bottle of wine. He is constantly trying to entertain his two sidekicks, hereby stealing all the attention from the friendly but apparently inexperienced staff in the dining area. This lack of style, (or rather; ability to maintain a proper dinner atmosphere), means one star less for Wreta. Sorry folks!

So who is it for?
The kitchen is not exactly over-delivering but Wreta Gestgifveri is not really a gourmet experience, as much as romantic getaway and a convenient place to go when you don’t want to spend a weekend in the city. And as such it works flawlessly. And if you run out of topics around dessert at dinner, you can always talk about the afternoon tea buffet…

* * * WRETA GESTGIFVERI IS CURRENTLY CLOSED * * *

Wreta Gestgifveri
Wreta Gård AB
610 50 Jönåker
Sweden

+46-155-720 22

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